In Westville Kenobia

I mean West Philadelphia.  And South, central and North.  But apparently not East for some reason.  Slowhands, Balls and I boarded the Megabus on Wednesday night and ended up in Philly on Thursday morning a little tired and a little stiff from bus sleeping.  This trip was made possible by Couchsurfing, a handy way to travel that is not only easy on the budget but gets you the inside view of the city.  But more information on that in another post to come.  There is so much to cover so let's break it down:

Market Street, City Centre

The Mutter Museum (should have an umlaut over the 'u')

Thursday:  Arrive.  Learn the transit system (which, by the way, is a bit of a nightmare but you get used to it).  Show up at couchsurf-host 1 and leave stuff behind.  Thank goodness!  Then we headed downtown to explore and let the other ladies register for the American Speech-Language and Hearing Association (ASHA) conference, the real reason for this trip.  I was just in for the hang.  We learned that Philadelphia is the home of the insanely cheap footwear.  A few people bought boots.  Many of us tried on a plethora.  Eventually I got my way, though, and we headed to the Mutter Museum to check out the cool human specimens.  The wall of skulls was especially fascinating as each was kept as an examplar of a specific cranial abnormality.  It was fun to try to identify it without first reading the associated card.  One even had eroded alveolar processes (what happens when one has no teeth for an extended period of time).  I also learned that syphillis doesn't just make ya crazy but it can eat holes in your face and skull:  protect yourself!  Balls then introduced us to Trader Joe's and it really is as fun as people say.  So fun, in fact, that we ate peanut butter puffin cereal for a few days.  I think I'm having Puffin withdrawal.  Thursday night we hung out with Couchsurfers (CS1A & CS1B) and a friend of theirs attempting the didgeridoo and introducing our new friends to Dutch Blitz (it was a hit!).  A bit of irony introducing Pennsylvanians to a Pennsylvania Dutch game.

Creepy prison

"Famous" Temple bell tower

Friday:  Slowhands bailed early for her conference so I decided to take a run around the neighbourhood.  Without even realizing it I ran up the steps behind the Art Museum (ie. the Rocky steps).  Anyone who saw me must have been thinking "crazy tourist, the steps are on the other side".  The rest of the morning was spent wandering around the old Eastern State Penitentiary with my camera.  Definitely a dark and freezing cold stone prison built to specialize in isolation of criminals from each other.  Without a tripod most of the photos weren't very useable but I did discover a colour palate I like.  Prison Promenade: jade green, rusty orangeish-red and slate gray.  Perhaps I'll decorate a bathroom in those colours.  The rest of the day was spent on Temple Campus in the geology department, moving our stuff from North Philly (CS1) to West Philly (CS2) and going to a local open mic in someone's house where people displayed such talents as performing their own hiphop, reading children's stories, reading children's stories as Christopher Walken would, and playing various instruments.


Saturday:  Slowhands took it easy on the conference this time and we wandered up to UPenn campus in search of breakfast.  Long story short Slowhands had pie and tea on the trolley and I relaxed in McDonald's to mooch their free wifi.  This greasy breakfast was followed by a personally guided walking tour of UPenn and a visit to the archeology museum on the campus where I learned about various cultures including the Apache and Navajo.  It was $6 well spent.  A 40 minute walk later I met my partner in traveling crime and we proceeded to try on even more pairs of boots and dresses we couldn't afford in Macy's while Joshua Golden, apparently a tween-dream, performed on the main level.  The evening brought us to South Philly again in search of the Magic Gardens.  Along the way we found a restaurant with a very random vegan menu which I am convinced was open not to provide nutritious and tasty meals (it really wasn't) but to surreptitiously promote Falun Gong based on the propaganda on the giant flatscreen television.  The Magic Gardens was well worth the walk and can't really be described other than a wonderland build of pottery and found objects.  It really requires photos*.

Sunday:  A full day of tasty breakfast, Elfreth Alley (the oldest continuously inhabited city block with houses built as early as 1728), cheesy souvenir shops, The Franklin Institute and Philly Cheese Steaks (yes, capitals are necessary).  The Franklin is a set up similar to the Ontario Science Centre.  It dumbs down science for kids and most exhibits are broken.  But it was still a good time (a Canary heart beats about 800 times a minute!  A cat heart provides one of the best dance beats**).  The major appeal of the centre was the promise of a planetarium:  gazing into stars, identification of constellations, images from the hubble all projected on a dome above your head, right?  Not exactly.  A tale of the Mayan people and their connection to start turtles.  I felt bad for falling asleep in the 'film' until I looked over and both of my companions appeared to be enjoying some REM as well.  If you go to Philly you should try a cheese steak and then you should immediately check yourself into a hospital for bypass surgery.  I ate just over half so props to me!  Props to Slowhands for (almost) chugging through and ignoring those two (tiny) onions on her sandwich. 

*I'll actually add some later but my patience is being tried by Blogger; it is not letting me upload any more photos for no particularly good reason.
**This is a subjective claim, not objectively posited by the Franklin.

The Hottest Ticket in Town: Mumford & Sons

I overheard someone using that phrase to describe the concert I attended on Saturday with MMM (formerly Bethaf), Gloves (I feel like I have a different nickname for her on here somewhere...) and some friends of Gloves.  It definitely felt like the hottest ticket.  I'd like to say we were packed into the Sound Academy like a cornfield but that would imply some sort of order and really handy rows for walking.  There was none of that, just a giant crush of people drunkenly spilling drinks and singing along.

But enough of the whining because I was quite happy to be there.  They have a way of singing/performing with so much earnestness for their young age.  Their lyrics have layers (just like orgres) and seem to reveal more life experience than expected (or at least insight).  For a run down on the setlist, a few clips and a general review of the music see this post by MMM.  We tend to agree musically and I was basically waiting for her to summarize it for me.  This time though I have a feeling our opinions will intersect for the music and diverge on other concert-related thoughts.  

There was some chatter among the Christian concert-goers that I wasn't entirely oblivious to myself.  Late into their set the band played one of my favourite songs of theirs:  Awake My Soul.  It has religious undertones.  It is a ballad of earnest people humbly calling out for their souls to awaken.  The audience sang along.  The Christian response is sadness for the sad irony of many "unsaved" people calling out to be awakened.  I felt this sadness at first and quickly rejected it as a remnant from my Christian past.  The more that I considered these feelings, though, I realized that they do not have to come from a jesus-focused perspective.  It is difficult to explain as I lack eloquence at times but it carries the same undertones even in a secular world.  So many people in society wake up each day with the mindset of just getting through the day, of earning more, of consuming more, of getting to the weekend to party harder.  This can seem empty from any perspective.  It is still somewhat arrogant of me to even assume that a more "enlightened" existence (as I define it) is even what these people would want or that I have found it myself but the sadness and irony can still exist.

I apologize for not quite explaining that right.  I'll mull it over on the long bus ride but I wanted to post about the concert before I left for Philadelphia.  And, since this is my current obsession, running update:  I'm bringing my running clothes with me to Philly but I'm totally okay with NOT running.  In fact, it probably won't happen.  That made me a bit anxious since I fear losing all this stamina I've built up.  I think I need to CHILL.  5 days won't hurt me.  Maybe I need some recovery time:  hills on Wednesday were sloooooow (or felt slow). 

Another update:  I rarely seem to just go 5km anymore.  I never thought I would ever say just 5km.  I should clarify something though:  running still isn't easy.  It is more enjoyable, I'm faster, I no longer need to stop, even for long distances, but it is still challenging.  I still want to quit sometimes.  G-sis and I did a 9.5km run yesterday though and I remember thinking oh, that's not bad, 10km.  I can't wait for the day when 15km feels that way.

Weekly Groceries

In an effort to buy fewer meals out I've been spending a bit more on groceries each week. I'm also trying to up the vegetable ratio add good complete proteins and healthy fats. These past few months I've been culinarily lazy (not necessarily unhealthy). I also went shopping hungry. Hi-C and I covered 12.4km in 1:12:50. Calculated at 5:52min/km. If we could keep that up for another 8.7km we could do a half in 2:06. Our last km was likely the fastest, which is a good sign.
I fear over-training though. It is three months until the half and we're more than halfway there. My mileage (I track in kms but is kilometerage a word?) has spiked recently and that isn't always the wisest move. This week I've already hit 32km and I'd like to add 5 tomorrow morning just to stay consistent. But I digress, this is a post about food. Understandably I was pretty stinkin' hungry near the end of my shop, having run, showered and then headed out the door again without a snack (nothing looks tasty after a run).

My $33.25 went to:
Beets (this is my first ever purchase of beets! I'm going to roast them with a host of other tuberous veggies)
Parsnips (another first!)
1L of 1% milk (usually it is 2L but I'm headed out of town on Wed)
12pk diet Pepsi with lime (oh the the poor judgment on that one. It is my first case of pop since the semester started. I really feel so much healthier when not drinking pop regularly...come over and help me drink it?)
Balkan Style Yogurt (I like my dairy products full of fat and I plan to use this in my overnight oats because I hate cleaning the oat pot)
Roasted Red Pepper Salad Dressing
Strawberry Jello
Black Beans (canned)
Blackberries (fresh blackberries on sale in Nov??)
Peppercorn Goat Cheese (probably too much for just me so I should get creative. I couldn't say no....)
2 bananas
1 sweet potato
Package of powdered donuts (guess what I ate two of when I got home....here is why we don't grocery shop hungry children)
Whole wheat pitas
Grapes
6 omega-3 eggs (is the omega thing still considered legit?)

Riveting wasn't it? Now you know what my grocery bill looks like. It usually involves some sort of baked good (oh how I wish those donuts were an anomaly) but the pop was me caving in. And I drank one tonight. And my head feels aspartame-y. Now to decide what to wear to Mumford & Sons....

No Backing Out!

A few posts back I dared to bring up the idea of a Half Marathon (yes, it deserves respect as a proper noun). Then I chuckled to myself a little because, well, winter is coming, people! But I mentioned the idea to Hi-C and she started researching Halfs (yes, not Halves, like the Maple Leafs) - researching during class of course. Our biggest obstacle were the criteria for both of us: 1) that it take place before May since we'll be headed abroad; 2) that we can afford to get there (ie. bus accessible).

That left us with (drum roll) - the Winterman*! (eye roll please). Check that bad boy OUT! Ottawa, Feb 20th. THAT is hardcore. I sure hope we aren't all talk because I forked over $50 for it. Correct, dear reader(s), we have registered.

Quote "Katie ----- is Registered for
Somersault Winterman Half Marathon"

I wanted a screenshot for drama but there was too much personal info on it and I was too lazy to haze it all out. But basically, Hi-C and I are clearly insane. I'm not sure if $50 will be enough to get make me run hills in -25 degree weather.

*Apparently they let women run it, too.

Lucky 13

Getting out of bed felt especially difficult this morning. It wasn't as dark as the last few weeks (thank you, time change) yet it was still a struggle. But I was rewarded for responding to my alarm. A few days ago I mapped out a 15km run for this weekend as my long slow day. All the research I've been doing has emphasized that distance and speed should be trained separately: to get your body used to running for longer periods of time just take'er easy for as long as you can. And slowly I went. Once you start getting over 10km the routes start getting long. Unfortunately I missed a section of the route I had mapped since it was almost entirely new. This meant I did not reach my goal of 15km (since I didn't realize my mistake until I was safely on my couch) but at 13kms it was still a personal distance record.

This is officially favourite run so far. I started off slowly, a bit daunted by the distance ahead. I made the mistake of having the first 3-5 kms on pedestrian heavy roads during rush hour so I was slowed by them and by many many traffic lights. But I seemed to gain strength as I ran. Instead of becoming exhausted I began to feel my breathing, to move with the rhythm of the music (Rockefellar Skank!) and even bounce down the road as I widened my stride. For the second half of the run I relished every minute of it, every footstep. I mouthed the words to "Miami" by Will Smith assuming that everyone else on the sidewalk knew I had earned the right to look a bit foolish since I had already run over 10km.

The longer my runs get the more I understand the need to run. The enjoyment factor. It took me (what felt like) forever to reach 10km as I constantly doubted myself, felt uneasy about the distances. The day I hit 10km, G-sis encouraged me by saying that once you hit 10 a huge mental block is gone and the distances seem more manageable. She was right. Half marathon: watch out!

The Day I Fell for Klezmer Music

ShanWow, Hi-C and I were treated to a lovely dinner courtesy of SlowHands tonight (my first Yorkshire puddings! No really pudding!). This served as great fuel for a few hours of swallow-report editing. After our impressively productive evening (the report isn't due until Nov 30th!) everyone but the cook headed to the Tranzac to see ShanWow's husband (Byron Birdman) play. He is 1/5th of an ensemble, "The Last Birdmen", that play Klezmer music. The place was small and the atmosphere great and I discovered a new favourite kind of music.

First reason it was great: it was the perfect combination of instruments. No vocals needed just an accordion (Byron), drums, bass, clarinet and violin. The drummer was fascinating to watch as he seemed to find a new sound from each drum and cymbal every time he used it. His drums were littered with various metal objects, some of which he would pick up partway into a song, tap once and then place on the ground not to be used again. But that note needed to be there.

It has been a musical weekend for me. Friday night the lovely Beth* invited me to see The Morning Benders at the Mod Club. Instead of saying no because I didn't know them and I'm cheap (there, I said it. I wasn't fooling anyone) I said yes because it sounded fun. It was fun! Before the show I had listened to the album about 4 times and nothing felt like it stuck with me so my hopes weren't especially high. But I was pleasantly surprised at the quality of their show and the talent of the band. Their cover of Fleetwood Mac's "Dreams" was swoon-worthy (including bubbles. From the ceiling!). After the concert we chatted in a cafe in Little Italy. They sold my red velvet cupcake to someone else after selling it to me so they upgraded me to a whole slice. I love a deal! Red Velvet is worth it for the icing.

*She already did all the work re-capping this concert so read it here!

New Fave Snack

This is not going to blow anyone's socks off but I'm basically in heaven. Over the moon, if you will.

Get this gloriousness:
1. Whole wheat saltines (they are just so much more fibe-ful!)
2. Salt Spring Island goat cheese. That's British Columbia! There is a pretty flower at the bottom and it was an outrageously good deal: regular price $12 (!) for 120ml on for $5! So, still pricey but the creamiest, most yummiest goat cheese.
3. President's Choice (I have found a nearby grocery store that meets this requirement!) has a new double-fruit jam: STRAWBERRY RHUBARB! I'm never going back to regular berries. Although there is still more sugar in it by weight than rhubarb it is just like momma's pie fillin!

Most of my meals will likely consist of these three items until the cheese is gone.

Keep the Pace

This morning G-sis and I headed out for a morning run, darkness and all (where are you daylight savings time?!). We did 7.1 at a pace of 5:44/km or under 41 minutes. It didn't even feel that fast...tricky! I was feeling so good about the pace.

Then I read about Scott Jurek, ultramarathoner*. The best of the best ultra-runners keep the same pace as I did....but for 100 miles (or more)! Most of the time they are likely even faster but their time counts stops, bathroom breaks, refueling, curling up on the side of the trail and wanting to die. This pace also includes then running mountain trails, covering 13 miles of uphill climb just to do it again later in the course. These are some of the most intense people on earth.

*I'm currently obsessed with reading about ultras. Ultra-running is basically any distance longer than a marathon. We're talking 50 miles, 100 miles, 135 miles!

Confessions

I haven't run since FRIDAY. I'm dreading tomorrow. I think it is the cold dark mornings.

I made Finnish Coffee bread yesterday and I've eaten half a loaf. It turned out much too crumbly and not dense enough. I theorize that it was a lack of flour: typically I add much more flour than it suggests but this time I decided to follow the recipe more carefully to determine if I was making a horrible mistake and the bread could somehow be even better than other batches. I was incorrect. From now on I will use way too much flour.

There was another one....oh yes. Our top 10 placement choices were due today. I put quite a few "fast-paced acute care" positions up in there. I'm a little terrified and oh so excited. THIS is what I want to be doing!

A Follower is Born

I hate to admit it but I never wanted to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show until I saw it on Glee (I know, BOO). Before the uber hot Mr Shue & Emma* scene I didn't realize how fantastic the music was. Based on this new knowledge a group of friends and I headed out waaaay to early for tickets on All Hallows Eve (also the 35th anniversary of the RHPS) to stand in line for 2 hours.

Verdict: well worth the wait. And nothing like what I expected.

What I thought it would be: A film in a cool old theatre. A dedicated crowed of followers would shout lines in unison at every 5-10 minutes. People would laugh and throw the customary toast, rice and toilet paper.

What it is really like: more awesome but don't expect to hear the movie itself. A shadow cast acted the entire film on a stage in front of the stage and in the aisles. Before the show there was a costume contest (a guy dressed like a Martian - yup yup - from the Muppets won). There was quite a bit of profanity - apparently yelling obscenities and making rude remarks between audience members and cast is expected and considered socially acceptable. There is definitely the shouting of lines at key instances, however, it is a constant murmur over the movie. The script is elaborate, differs from person to person, venue to venue and requires great familiarity with the RHPS. ShanWOW was kind enough to fill us in on a few easy lines before the show started so we could play along. Prepared with my newspaper I held it over my head while Janet and Brad were in the rain and the rest of the audience squirted water all over our paper-covered heads. We were covered in toilet paper (and did some throwing ourselves) after a character shouted "great Scott!". I'd like to go again after brushing up on some of my lines.

Tidbit of information: this is a regular occurrence in Toronto. Monthly that is. Put on at the Bloor Cinema by Excited Mental State. This is definitely the way to see Rocky Horror.

*There seems to be two camps in this argument: some people (TinTin) think it was the best thing since bagged salad and watched it upwards of 15 times; some people find it desperate and creepy.

The plan this morning was to head over to former-roomie's place (my sublet from the summer) just around the corner to make pancakes with/for Ex-Roomie and Jharv then come home and do a project. The pancakes definitely were made and eaten. The homework is still waiting. Those two ladies are my pop culture gurus who make sure that I'm only awkwardly uninformed instead of shockingly and embarrassingly uninformed about pop culture. I found out that Lindsay Lohan has "coke bloat". Oh and that Sarah Michelle Gellar had a baby (last year). Both are my source for all things Britney (everyone needs that kind of source.....right?). I knew I was never leaving when we started the discussion about Cruel Intentions and I said, "We can put it on and I'll just watch the first few minutes." That is never successful. But the film was even more amazing/awful/tragic than I remembered. And the soundtrack!

Inspired by this mid-afternoon nostalgia session we each made a list of top 5 late-90s/early 2000s movies that, well, I can't actually remember the criteria but just that they were memorable, we watched them too many times and, as we discovered while discussing, had some edge.

My top 5*:
1. Dangerous Minds
2. Cruel Intentions
3. Ever After
4. 10 Things I Hate About You
5. Now & Then**

It was also agreed upon while scouring youtube for one particular instance of a Christina Aguilera high note that the first time humans harmonized was likely one of the most beautiful moments of human history. Oh to be in that cave.

*Not necessarily in order.
**This one has been subject to change. Still wrestling with it.

10 Again (but more Hardcore)

A few weeks ago some of us (in the SLP program) signed up for a more official run with the large athletic company I mentioned in a few earlier posts. Thinking it was a free race I went for the 5km but switched to 10 last week when I hit the mark. However, at 7am when I peered out the window to see rain and darkness I started to regret my choice. I moseyed on over there anyway since I had friends to mock me if I didn't show. The music woke me up when I walked through the doors at 8am to sign in and chill. I usually don't eat before I run but I was glad that I ate my banana earlier since we didn't get running until 845am. Around 830 I started to get worried because my running partner (G-sis) wasn't there yet. She sets my pace and provides excellent running company so I was fairly disappointed when I got her text saying she had slept in but would try to make it. Shout-out to G-sis though, she sprinted the 2km to get to the race on time and then still ran 10km with.

I am so glad I went. Unfortunately it wasn't timed but as far as we can tell it was 1 hour almost exactly. The point really wasn't the time though, it was the atmosphere: if I want to do races I have to be more flexible in my running. I had to eat beforehand, which I never do. I still refused to participate in the warm-up because, well, I just don't warm up. It was raining, the route ended up being almost all trail (somewhat painful in fivefingers on those rocks!) and they weren't shy about hills. Even though my legs felt like wet cement around the 8km mark we pushed through to pick up our pace significantly at the end and rolled through the finish at about middle of the pack. I felt so hardcore with the mud up my legs and all over my feet. It was such an invigorating run.

Before the run they gave us great shirts made of the softest wicking fabric I have ever touched. And long sleeves! Thank you large company! Breakfast afterward was complimentary and they had a station to personalize your medal (is it a race if you get a medal?) with engraving. Here is what I got:

No idea why I can't get this to show up in the ideally rotated position. I recommend leaning your head sideways. Sorry for any inconvenience.

Fall Adventure

My brain has shut off. Today Hi-C and I went on a glorious fall adventure through the Toronto of lore with rivers and colourful leaves. I keep starting this post over and over but I can't get it to sound quite as entertaining as the actual adventure was. Basically I want to throw out a bunch of related words and hope you get the point: leaves! Orange! High Park! Tandem Bike! Tea!

Have you figured out what we did today?

Hi-C and I have the fortune of hanging out with the couple who gave us our scholarships*. Every few months we get an invite to do something active with them (and usually drink wine afterward). Did I mention that they are.....over the age of 65 (how does one speculate about this?). They lent us their tandem bike and led us around the city for about 4 hours through fall leaves, over bridges, down busy streets and along Lake Ontario. They just don't quit. We have the tandem bike figured out by now. That is, if Hi-C is in the front and I'm in the back being almost entirely ornamental. As a pit stop along the way they treated us to high tea at Montgomery's Inn where they served us in full 1800s costumes in their replica Victorian tavern.

Today we learned that Milkweed is super cool and soft. That I have no balance and shouldn't drive a tandem bike. That Toronto can be exquisite in the autumnal season.

Here are some classic shots:




*We each received a scholarship to complete our final placements in a developing country (May-July 2011!).

Living for the Future

The future being that unforeseeable time when I don't have to study. My life this week (and most of the week before) has consisted of bed, run, school, bed. Some days I show up for morning class, stake out a room on the study for (with my very own whiteboard!) and hunker down until close to midnight. Start the cycle again the next morning. Dinner last night was one of those mr. Noodles (ok, the store brand...) in a wrapper which I crushed, poured into my "World's Best Dad" mug, added boiling water (thank you student lounge). I need healthier food to support such study habits. That is why my posts have seemed like one big perseveration on running: not a whole lot else is going on. Externally at least. Plenty running through this cranium of mine but, as of yet, I've filtered it from the blog. The joy for me today was laundry. Clean clothes! Reading a textbook at home! On my very own couch!

Looking a little further in the future an adventure awaits. Mid-November trip to Philadelphia! Apparently it is so much more than the Fresh Prince of Bel Air song suggests*. There are museums! And history! And there is cuteness! I was undecided due to the costmoney factor until someone pointed out the Mutter to me. Get this: specimens in jars of deformed things. Um, yes please! Now I'm sold. We have the bus tickets so we had better find a place to stay. I have fulfilled my goal of hosting a couchsurfer (or two!) but have yet to surf myself. JPD and I have decided to remedy this lapse and have sent out copious messages and have received some yeses (yes's?). There is something so satisfying about checking off an item on the ol' life list. Cool sounding city in a very cold month, here we come!

Side note: I have only see some very key places in the winter months. Montreal and Niagara Falls being the most notable. The intense bitter cold detracts somewhat from traveling enjoyment. Please have a warm snap Philadelphia (the sitcom promises I should at least see some sun).

*(that was not the word I wanted...What was it? Word retrieval issues! Gah!)

Apparently this has Become a Blog About Running

For all of October my blog has been dominated by running. It is an area of life right now that gives me a sense of accomplishment and focus*. JPD informed me yesterday that I have made it because my body now craves movement and exercise; I become restless without it and long to stretch out my legs.

But this post is also to give perspective. I tend to post positive update and achievements on here, who wouldn't? Well today is a realistic post. First, I'm not that good at running but maybe that is why I feel so successful when I hit milestones. Each one is hard-earned. Some people can wake up and run 10km without having trained at all. I do not fall into that category and I never will.

Second, sometimes running just sucks. Sometimes I have a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad run. Today was one of those days. G-sis picked me up this morning at 715 for some hill work (to prep for our 10km race on Sunday). We both felt exhausted (I know I got home last night at 1030 after class and studying). I was winded 5 minutes in and it never stopped. We rested at the top of the hills which is not common. I almost threw up after first round of that incline but we decided to do it again. On the way back, a mangled raccoon a foot from our shoes threw off our breathing and we both slowed to a walk in order to recover (it was really mangled....oh the eyes and the guts!). At least we both had an off day.

*I guess spending 12-16 hours a day at school lately has been giving me the same thing. My life currently consists of class, studying, the occasional treat, short bursts of housework and that's about it.

Goal Met. New Goal Set.

Goal: 10km (running without stopping)
Achievement: 10.4km
Time: 1:05:17.
Thoughts:
1) WOOOHOOOO!!!!!
2) Living downtown TO is cramping my running style with all their traffic lights! We did not stop but the time doesn't account for all of the time/distance spent running up and down the street while waiting for the light to change. I think our true time could have been 1:01:00 or even under and hour. Even with the higher-than-I-wanted time we were running at 6:16/km.
3) Why did I map a route where 1/3 of it was a "gradual" incline?
4) After a long run is the only time that I ever have to remind myself to eat a meal. Oh right, I ran 10km maybe I should eat something before showering/blogging/making my lunch/selecting a nail polish colour.
5) I signed up to run the [insert name of large athletic corporation here]. BUT I selected the 5km race. Stink. Perhaps they will allow me to switch to 10km and actually push myself.
6) What if I come in last on the 10km? I know I wouldn't come in last for 5km.......
7) When does the instinctual desire to eat a healthier diet kick in as so many have promised me?
8) As my runs start getting longer I'll have to start planning for bathroom emergencies and hydration/electrolyte balance more carefully (read: at all). Perhaps I'll become a [insert name of sports drink here] junky.
9) I hope I start getting the fabled "runner's high". So far it has been largely a myth for me. However, around the half-way point today I did get a brief and mildly-euphoric feeling that got me up the 2 km of inclination. If those would happen more often I may become a believer.
10) Around kilometer 9 I forgot I had legs. They seemed to act independently of the rest of my body. That was glorious.

New Goal: the [dreaded] HALF marathon
Thoughts:
1) Ow.
2) Winter is creeping up (I have a feeling it will eventually make a sneak attack) and perhaps I should be prepared.
3) Wait, winter!? How dedicated am I to this half marathon idea? Brr.
4) Apparently chafing may soon become a concern. Then I'll be a real runner.

Someone mentioned reading my blog. They made a statement like "I don't know how to put it all out there" (shout out to Reese's). To be honest, the stuff I share on here feels like the epithelial layer: very important, crucial protective mechanism but fairly simple compared to all the complex tissues that it protects. This is my 4th entry in the month of October and I believe that all of them revolve around running. Running is my outlet right now but I get my drive from something deeper. The most painful thing is not being able to share my achievement with my (former) best friend.

Personal Best

As a thanksgiving gift to myself I went for a run. Feeling good after retaining my 7km last week and inspired by obligatory inspirational story of triumph over adversity in my latest running mag I upped it. 8.25km. No stopping, not even lights. In 51:49 which puts me at 6:16/km. That is a pretty nice pace over that distance. My goal of 10km is not so far off (although I'll need a new goal then!).

Other thought: I may have to bring a friend more often or re-introduce music to my running. I'm close to an hour out there now and a new route makes it exciting but I bet it will start to get old fast. Perhaps putting more effort into my playlists will be the solution.

Update to the Running Update

Since my big runs on wed & thurs I have been pathetically hobbling around. Stairs are the worst. If I sit for a while and have to walk afterward I limp. It is my calves. They feel like they are tearing out of my legs. With-every-step. Enough whining. Luckily it is just lactic acid and not a muscle sprain or a joint problem. I'll be back out tomorrow. The problem lies in the Liberties (minimalist shoes that are not Vibrams). When I bought the Vibrams I was warned to "take it easy", to break in to them. I didn't listen and paid the price with sore calves. I hadn't considered that going back to shoes should be done with equal precaution so I went full-out, not having worn real shoes for a run since May. Woops. The lesson should be learned by now.

Running Update #?

My computer recently had a massive virus. It is chugging along again but I have lost those helpful cookies that tell me what titles I have used for my blogs in the past....ie. Running Update #?.... It was a good hiatus for a few days not to be able to use the computer whenever I wanted. I need less computer in my life. But I can explore that another time.

These last two weeks have been difficult. You might have noticed a less-than-chipper tone to my recent posts. My funk is lifting but in that brief time I misplaced much of my motivation. Starting up this week with a better attitude I thought I had lost some of my drive (and stamina!) to run. Well reader(s), I've still got it!

Monday: I decided to jog out a 7km in the morn' to see if I could still do it, reminding myself that I could stop if needed. Other than traffic lights I ran that course down, much faster than expected. Not blazing by any means but a good pace.
Wednesday: 3km + 20 minutes of aerobics and strength training*
Thursday: approx 6km (40+ minutes). This was my first running epiphany in a while. My running buddy (G-sis) and I were chugging along, close to the half hour mark, and I started thinking how I was tired and could justify taking a short walk-break since I had run less than 12 hours before, we had already been out a half hour, I was slowing down, whine whine whine. It was that I realized I could suck it up. No problem at all, my legs weren't tired, nothing hurt, I was breathing fairly easily. Apparently I just don't enjoy the feeling of challenging my body. So I'm going to start enjoying the feeling of a challenge. No need for stopping, I think it is time to up the distance factor. Except my calves are killing me ;)


*There is a certain athletic shoe and clothing conglomerate near campus that has a fairly ingenious marketing program (not ingenious enough because I won't mention them directly to count as a hit on google). Every evening they have a free running club. Anyone is welcome. The best part is they lend you everything: shoes**, running spandex pants, tshirt, jacket, sports bra, socks. The whole shebang. No need to lug your gear to work/school. They even give you all the sports drink you could want. Let you test their fancy computerized running software and device. They benefit too, of course. The most obvious is that we try their products. The runs also happen to be in the heart of Toronto at rush hour: mob of runners covered in their logo looking fit and fine through the busy streets.

**This company makes a fancy shoe, let's call it the Liberty, that is supposed to be a shoe but also mimic barefoot running. As a supporter and lover of the fivefingers I was curious and fairly ready to tear them apart. I was disappointed when they weren't allowing us to demo the lightest model but settled for the middleweight. Let's be honest, they felt pretty good. Maybe it was just my poor feet used to pounding the pavement bare but I do think they had some merit. Some. But enough for me to consider a pair. Not to replace the fivefingers but as a winter substitute. My lovely non-shoes will soon be unable to provide enough insulation to run in the bitter Toronto winters. My first instinct it to buy the more insulated vibrams, however I'm wary of their ability to last straight through to spring. This may be a good compromise. Not sold yet though.

Biology

Spirituality has been on my mind lately. Which is interesting because, personally, I don't feel the need for any form of spirituality in my life. It is not exactly that I know there is no God. I don't know. Some people would classify this as Agnostic. Agnosticism, however, seems to imply some deep wrestling with the eternal question. For me it isn't as much about whether God (god?) exists or not but whether I care about his existence.

There are some down sides to leaving religion behind though. For instance, believing in biology leaves much to be desired. Biology itself is lovely and quirky, full of surprises. Take the recurrent laryngeal nerve. But for all of its beauty it is fairly shallow. Believing in biology gives no real hope. There is no reason to believe that life or the future has to tip the balance in favour of happiness for any one person. Or that any written rule or fate would ensure that a person is provided with another chance at happiness. This belief is often commonly held in North America even without basis. And perhaps, as humans, we need to believe in this ultimate "righting" in order to function. Maybe that is where I falter, as a realist. We are not owed a happy ending. Our culture of plenty and self-fulfillment seems to teach that we are. Ask all the people who never had a chance, those kids-starving-in-africa who are not ever going to be able to reach out to God to comfort them when they succumb to horrible malnutrition. God is a concept that works out better for those with opportunities. Adjusting to this type of reality is not necessarily easy. The source of hope for those without spirituality can seem a mystery.

Growth and Friendship

This week has been a week of learning. Life has taught me (from both sides of the coin) that someone can hurt you in ways that they never meant to by doing what they need to do for themselves. It still hurts.

There are four people in my life that I owe some major thanks. The giant, pay-it-forward kind of thanks. Hi-C and ShanWow thanks for all your time you could have been studying craniofacial anomalies and deglutition sacrificed for something entirely less glamourous.

For the two others, I haven't mentioned them on here before. We have known each other since I was an incredibly awkward teenager and I was wholly intimidated by them. Funny how things change as you grow up ;) I have been struggling to write this post. The best way to explain them would be: if you asked me if there was anyone who, regardless of whether I choose to believe in God or not, truly represents the fundamental message of love for other people that Christianity claims I would immediately say yes. Of course people can be loving without religion, that isn't the issue. However, when someone lives their faith as honestly as them who am I to question where that comes from? Perhaps I am forced in this instance to bend my worldview ever so slightly to fit them inside. I aspire to live (and love) like that some day. Thank you.

Surf

This weekend kept me busy but not too busy to have some fun too. Both Friday and Sunday were spent earning "free" film passes by ripping tickets at TIFF (Toronto International Film Festival) and reading my book in between. A slow day on Friday also meant free movie while volunteering. Except I went in knowing only the title and that it was French. There definitely should have been a caveat for those who dislike seeing women be violated.

Brief synopsis of Deep In the Woods (Au fond des bois): Creeper with dirty fingernails (barf, the nails!) exits woods. Charms family in upper middle class 19th century French home by performing magic tricks and pretending to be mute and mysterious except the prophecies he writes. Accosts daughter the next day where he does some hocus pocus, rapes her (which happens repeatedly throughout the film...) and causes her to follow him around the French countryside. Way too Stockholm Syndrome for my tastes. The caveat should have read: "Warning: for serious film buffs only or people who can look past horribly uncomfortable scenes for symbolism that probably really isn't there". The cinematography was quite beautiful though.


Now, on to the update I titled this for: couchsurfing. Having been a member for a few years I had yet to actually surf or host until this weekend. Mostly because I haven't traveled somewhere that I needed to surf (or, in Boston, 4 proved too many to house) and have never before had a space to host in. Things have changed; my new roomie (The Roomie) is all over it and even has experience. Other than being on a loud street with no curtains on the living room windows we do alright: futon, blankets, warm apartment, witty conversation. Friday until this morning our futon was occupied by two sisters from Germany making their way from Montreal to Boston and New York and back again. E accompanied me on my run Saturday morning (and took it easy on me). K made us wonderful crepes. Both prepared a lovely soup (that I had as leftovers after my last TIFF shift). It could not have been a better first couchsurfing experience.

In an unrelated note: the friend currently referred to as Sharon on this site will henceforth retain the moniker "ShanWoW" for various reasons. One being an obvious play on the product "Sham Wow" and another (although this one was explained to me) a play on the Jersey Shore based on a character's nickname (ShayWow) and ShanWoW's lovely bicycle painted after the Italian flag.

Celeb-ration

I am not a person that follows the lives of celebrities. Until today I had never crossed paths with a real one (some hometown ones at some point I'm sure).

Perons I saw (distance from person)

Rachel MacAdams (2 ft) - from many things but The Time Traveler's Wife stands out to me.
Maria Bello (3 ft) - you may recognize her from e.r. or coyote ugly.
Michael Sheen (3 ft)
Amy Ryan (3 ft) - aka Holly from The Office
Daphne Rubin-Vega (3 inches)
Michael Sheen (3 ft)
Philip Seymour Hoffman (25 ft)

The cliche is true, they really are regular people like everyone else. Except maybe Rachel McAdams, she is fabulous. And Amy Ryan looked adorable in her red dress.

My Own Personal Nightmare

This is not an emo post. Do not fear. I was, however, out for a run this morning and went to a cutesy neighbourhood nearby. There were people everywhere and streets closed in an area that is usually quiet and peaceful. Then I saw them. GARAGE SALES! I guess, technically speaking, yard and sidewalk sales. Every three houses or so someone was selling their old crap, for cheap! Here is the nightmare part: I had NO MONEY. Not even a quarter to bargain with. Besides, had I stopped in my odorous state it may not have been appreciated.

Obviously you are all horrified by now. But it gets worse. I have to run OWeek all day today. I CAN"T GO BACK AND SALE! Nooooooooooooo! I'm heading out now for an even I've been excited for all week (summer) but now it is tainted.

A New Take on an Old Classic

When my father goes to Wawa he often buys perogies from the Polish Hall. He cooked up a batch while I was home and this got us brainstorming delicious combinations. Of course the Polish ladies make fabulous perogies, it's just that they make the standard ones. We came up with some ideas:
-Greek: feta, olives, oregano, potato
-Indian: potato, lentils, curry paste, peas (a little like a samosa), mild cheese
-Local: smoked fish (by my uncles), red skin potatoes, chives, local cheese

In all of our daydreaming we never got around to making the perogies (although I'm still game if you are, dad).

Today, Hi-C bestowed upon me her perogie skills and we improvised a scrumptious filling. We even decided to forgo more perogies and just ate the left over filling with a spoon. These little babies take hours, but they sure are worth it. First, you make the dough. You can find dough recipes online. A handy tip: use a pasta maker to get your dough to the right thickness (ie. flat). Cut out many many circular shells.

The marvelous filling (we used a recipe as a guide to proportions but just wing it)
-3 large sweet potatoes (baked until super soft then peel and mash)
-chopped chives
-chopped and caramelized onion
-genoa salami
-goat cheese
-rosemary
-pepper
-pinch of salt

Fold mixture in and seal (by squishing or with water if necessary). Fry up right away with some onions and butter or freeze to enjoy later. We did both of those things. We happened to get 25 each so I can have 3 perogies 8 times and one wonderful day with 4.

I was still feeling bake-y when I got home so I ripped open the box of cake-mix in the cupboard (ok, not that bake-y) and made THE MOST ABRASIVE cupcakes on earth. Strawberry flavoured with an unnatural pink hue. You see, I have an obsession. When I venture to the grocery store in the states I have to buy at least one thing. The sheer variety available, all the insane flavours they test on Americans before mass marketing in Canada is overwhelming. You thought choosing a flavour of Mini Wheats was a challenge at your local Canadian food basics???? Try it in the US*.

All this to say that the last time I went across I scored: strawberry cake mix, lemon icing (lemon!) and pineapple jell-o (I'm not entirely sure that this one is exclusively for the yanks). After opening the box of cake mix and pouring it into a bowl I discovered my need for three eggs and possession of two. Never fear, google is here. I felt smart replacing one egg with some apple puree until I "poured" in the puree and found it to be chunky. Now I have strawberry apple-chunk cupcakes. And no muffin liners. But with enough margarine they only semi-stuck to the pan. Oh, and they taste fairly awful.

*Upon further googling I have discovered that many of the flavours of Mini Wheats that once seemed totally insane have now been unleashed on the Canadian public.

I Know that Mangoes are Sweet

Camp songs anyone? "I Like Bananas" was high up there on my favourites list. But this post is about mangoes, peaches and pectin. It was on my to-do list to make jam while home in August and I made it on the very last day.

Initially, I found a recipe online for mango-peach jam that required no added sugar due to some fancy-schmancy, no-sugar-needed pectin. Except it wasn't available when I went to get supplies. Scratch that plan. I ended up with Certo pectin and just improvised with the peach jam recipe on the inside of the box. Half peaches, half mangoes. 5 cups of sugar (!) Even though the recipe didn't call for it I added a little cinnamon. It is tough to go wrong with fruit and cinnamon. My mom helped me (so I guess it wasn't all on my own) with the hardcore canning. Bake glass jars at 150F to sterilize. Boil lids, seals (plomb not phoque), tongs, funnel. When jam is all bubbly-boily ready funnel into jars then quickly apply seal and lid. Wait. If the lid compresses (can't be pushed down, like before you've opened your Snapple) you're good to go. Officially preserved.

Back in Toronto

The move was successful and I have been spending my days unpacking, planning Orientation Week, hanging out with friends and generally getting settled. We already have internet and it only took about 2-3 hours to set up. But I did it all by myself! I figured it out, even making our connectino all secure (so I think). The apartment is quite big although it has its quirks. My room has two large closet doors for the entrance which, I learned while changing, blow open if the window happens to be open at the same time and a stiff breeze is traveling through. The internet is plugged in to an outlet that is controlled by a light switch. Turning off the light also turns off the internet. Now we have to remember to use the switch on the lamp. There is only one outlet in my room and it happens to be 4 feet off the ground. This doesn't sound that bad but it did suck up two hours with my mom searching for a power bar with a long enough cord.

Not to complain. There are lots of good things. Right in downtown Toronto we have both a giant living room AND an eating area. Both! In the same apartment! The windows are large and give tons of natural light. There is SO MUCH STORAGE! Three large closets and a pantry. My closet is enormous, we should rent it out for extra cash. It is on the 5th floor of the building so it is just high enough up to get a workout from the stairs but low enough that it is totally reasonable to use them (not that I've been doing that).

Due to my recent bloggin hiatus I feel like there is so much to catch up on. Here is a sneak preview of things to come:

1. My first running injury. Actually, I'll finish this one off now. I can't say if the injury is from running but it is hindering my running. I had to stop after 10 minutes today from my pain on the top of my foot. Methinks it is some muscle up in there but the hours I spend walking each day probably haven't been helping. It is frustrating because I have only been going out 2-3 times per week lately so I don't need an obstacle I need everything in my favour since the chub is catching up with me.

2. Jam! I made it. It tastes great. Photos to follow.

3. Orientation Week. Fingers crossed that it goes smoothly.

[ETA: There is another positive about this building: ghost-vator. The elevator has a ghost and it is friendly. My mom noticed this first. Most of the time when I leave my aparment I press the elevator button and it is just chilling on the 5th floor waiting for me. I know, not THAT weird. BUT! The button for the first floor is also already pressed. But who pressed it? And why hasn't it gone to the first floor if it is pressed? Weird..... Thanks ghost/Patrick Swayze.]

Update on Goals

There are none. I hit a snag a few weeks back and my motivation to do anything other than basic self-care and watch Criminal Minds diminished to almost nil. More relationship drama that I'm trying oh-so-hard not to be emo about but to be a grown-up. So I'm back on the goal wagon but not likely in time to complete them before I move back to school on Wednesday. The lagging goals also include my 10km stretch. Considering that it has been almost two weeks (TWO WEEKS! I need some motivation!) since I last ran (and I am pretty ashamed of this) I'll have some seriously stamina-rebuild to do. It is hard to explain why I need so much motivation to go running: I enjoy it (most of the time), I like the satisfaction of progressing in my 'training', I long for it when I haven't done it (ok just a passing wish not so much with the pining). Alas, it has been 12 days. This had better improve because I believe that I agreed to run a 5km race in mid-Sept. I thought a looming race was supposed to motivate????

Worlds Collide

According to a list on wikipedia, these are the places in Toronto that make up Scott Pilgrim's world. I'll indicate where our worlds converge*.

Book 1

• Toronto Public Library - Wychwood Branch Walk by this on the way to the house of a supreme blogging duo (will not name duo since this is referencing their abode).
• The Rockit: This was a small venue for local bands in Toronto. Negative
  
• Pacific Mall: An Asian mall just outside the Toronto municipal limits. Done. Undergrad at G-welf. Miss Sassy Spont and Miss Nay-peer took me on an Asian Adventure. We ate dimsum, we took cheesy photos in a booth, we played DDR.
  

Book 2

• Sonic Boom: Nope
  
• No Account Video: Nope
• Casa Loma: Both the building itself (nope...sad!), as well as the Baldwin Steps, (check, ran these stairs with the talented JPD)
• Toronto Reference Library: A distinctive 6-floor reference library. Do I even need to mention this. Of course!
  
• Lee's Palace: A night club in Toronto, featuring local and international bands. Gloves and I witnessed an incredible concert by Mumford & Sons here in January.
  

Book 3

• Honest Ed's: A large discount store founded by Ed Mirvish, a local businessman and theatre mogul. Check. Meather, Sprimmer and I scored some classic crap (77 cent Kim Cattrall flick on Global Cooling).
  
• Yonge-Dundas Square: A large public square in downtown Toronto. Numerous times. Sighted almost daily.
  

Book 4

• The Beaches: On a variety of occasions. Cute area.
  
• Dufferin Mall: "The Dirty Duff". Can`t say that I have but this one may be worth checking out.
  
• Sneaky Dee's: A Tex-Mex cuisine bar and venue. On the list. Was supposed to do dinner here a few weeks ago but had to bail....
  
• Nipissing University: A small liberal arts university located in North Bay, Ontario. Negative. I don`t do north eastern Ontario ;)
  

Book 5

• Queen Street West: Must see Toronto area.
  
• Toronto Coach Terminal: The main intercity bus station So many long hours wasted here with the pigeons.
  

Book 6

• St. Christopher House: No
  
• The Cameron House: No
  

*This is based on the books and not necessarily on the film. Although it did have some classic shots of Lee`s Palace and Casa Loma along with a TPL location.

Wawa 2010

My uncle (Berd) & his daughter (Ace) stopped in on their spastic tour of northern ontario and New England (itinerary: Sault -- Wawa -- Sault -- Sudbury -- Ottawa -- Montreal -- Boston -- Hoboken). Since they would be passing back through I hopped in the backseat of their Ford "Exploder" and go along for the ride. Berd took us on a guided tour of the history of the area. I think he has fished, canoed or almost died just about everywhere. Even though it was mid-August, the rainy weather and wind churned up Lake Superior and brought it down to about 15 degrees ('it' being the temperature outside; I'm sure the water was even colder than that).

For the one night I stayed 'up north' I had the option of crashing in town or at my aunt and uncle's log home right on the shore of Lake Superior. Check. Waking up to have Long Beach (which really isn't very long) all to myself was not something I was willing to pass up. The lake has a history. For First Nations people, for the community and for my family. It is the lake that claimed the life of my great grandfather. It is the lake where my uncle caught the fish we had for dinner (smoked...drool). It is the shore that my family brought sand, wind and water from to my grandmother's bed in her last few days so she could feel like she was back in the place she loved the most. It swallowed the Edmund Fitzgerald. It is the site of the Ojibwe/Anishnaabe Creation Story.

This time it was where my cousins and I enjoyed a long sauna and at dusk, went wave-jumping until dark. At about 4 feet the waves still looked impressive but it was the undertow they created that was most dangerous. We swam only about 50 feet away from shore and, at times, you could walk towards the shore as a wave was going back out and end up further out to sea.

The rest of the guided history tour included one-lane gravel roads past the old open pit mine that supplied the ore to the cinter plant where my dad worked. After we abandoned the vehicle to terrible road conditions we continued to walk the mine road (eating blueberries along the way and encountering blueberry-stained bear poop) until we reached a blasted out portion to keep the locals out.

So much history of the area is lost as people continue to leave for bigger and better opportunities. This trip was a chance to put some of that history in my own head for safe keeping. Guided tour by the locals is the best way to experience small town Northern Ontario.

Accomplishing Left and Right

A few weeks ago I set some goals for myself for this August (here). Two have been officially checked off: pie and the postcard to postsecret. Two more can now be made official: meteor shower and the unnamed item. The meteor shower was more of a trickle but definitely worth it. Out at Pancake Bay Provincial Park on Thursday the clouds rolled in and out all day and I nervously waited to see if the meteor shower would be visible. By 10pm it was dark and the sky was clear so we stationed ourselves on the (almost) empty beach and gazed upward. We should have researched some more constellations beforehand because there was lots of staring up. The meteors were so fast and random that they were easy to miss. Between us we could confidently identify the Big Dipper and Cassiopeia (thank you Serendipity). Until that night I had seen perhaps 2 shooting stars in my lifetime. I have now seen over 20 and each was a gorgeous surprise when it burned through the atmosphere. Around midnight it started getting cold, dewy and the clouds came back so we headed to the campsite (possibly beaming a little).

Other camping highlights: swimming in lake superior for the first time in years (3 times!). Being informed of swimmers itch after going swimming. Roasting sausages on the campfire. Building campfires. Hiking 5 km through spiderwebs to lookout over the great lake. Why don't I camp more? Oh, because everything gets soggy when it rains.

Pie Numero Dos

Apparently I'm not on a pie kick. Part of the reason is that mastering pie crust takes practice. Finding the best crust takes trial and error. In my pie research I learned that crust is pretty simple. It needs 4 basic things: sugar, salt, flour and some sort of fat. The fat is where things get fun. Traditional types include shortening, butter, lard and oil. The first one I made was of the shortening variety. This more recent crust is the butter family. It smelled so much more luxurious as it baked. The dough itself was rich (yeah, I tried the dough...). Apparently lard makes the flakiest of flaky crusts but I can't yet bring myself to use pure animal fat.

The filling is raspberry peach. Mostly peaches and a handful of raspberries. A whole of of sugar. Also read this (scroll down a bit) beforing attempting a peach pie. Who knew that you don't just grab a knife and start peeling them like an apple! This should come in handy for my next project (peach mango jelly).

As of this moment I can't comment on taste. But since that is the most important aspect I'll update as soon as I can.

Baker's Note: I'm never going back to shortening. It doesn't compare. The crust was so flaky the top was breaking apart and it had a hint of shortbread taste. I think I have found my pie crust recipe so now I can just perfect this one. The filling, according to the sister, resmbles spiced peaches.

Brookies

Brownies and cookies in one magnificent pan of stupendousness. The idea came from here. Why have just one awesome thing when you can combine two of the most amazing desserts on earth? The gospel here is that YOU DON"T HAVE TO CHOOSE!

The recipe on the Bake at 350 website calls for box brownies and bag cookies. This isn't necessary! Whip up a good brownie recipe and then slap together some cookie dough and voila! It takes 20 minutes if you're quick (or if you have help.....ok are 'helping' someone faster). And maybe put some chocolate icing on top. Definitely put chocolate icing on top. I have changed your life, you're welcome.

Another Goal Down

This morning I checked off another summer goal: send a postcard to postsecret. It took me some time to actually think of a secret. I realized that the concept of secret is a relative term for me. Certain things are common knowledge with certain people or social circles and unmentioned in others. Perhaps I should work on my 'mystery' factor.

The secret is sent. I'm not expecting to see it on the website but I can check off something from my list and go on looking for more life goals.

First Summer Goal

The pie. It might not have been on my original list but I added pie because being able to create a superb and flaky pie crust seems to be the coveted baking task. My first go was a berry pie (rasp, straw & blue).

The crust.
The filling.
--I took the liberty of modifying this crust after a tutorial pie session from Fancy Nancy earlier this week where she taught me some secrets. In addition to the recipe I added 1/8th cup brown sugar, 2 tsp cinnamon, 2 tbsp flour. The berries were frozen.

Positives: the filling is a bit tart but also sweet. Not runny. The top crust has a beautiful golden look that appears flaky.
Developmental criticism: bottom crust was too tough. This means that I'll likely try a different crust next time. I'd like to do a butter crust instead of shortening next time. The crust was also a bit overworked because I rolled it out once and it looked lovely but, alas, it was too small and I had to start over. Beware.

The Trap

My parents' house is a trap. Meaning that this is where I find junk food all around me and it gets trapped in my hips. At school I'm usually much too cheap to keep junk food around (although pop has recently been welcomed into my home on a regular basis....). Here food is love. And boy are we loved. The things that I currently want but shouldn't eat, in order of "on my brain".

1. (recently discovered) Oreo drumsticks in the freezer
2. Sister's birthday cake on the table upstairs (perfect to take mini slices off every time I pass by)
3. cinnamon buns on the counter
4. carrot coconut muffins on the counter (#3 & #4 were brought home by my dad from a local bakery even though there was birthday cake in the vicinity)
5. strawberry rhubarb pie in the freezer just waiting for an oven revival
6. granola (with chocolate!) on the counter
7. the pie that I am about to make

Not only is there a plethora of actual desserts but also potential desserts. All the ingredients I could want to check off pie and jam off my list of summer to-dos. Add Finnish Coffee bread to the list because I don't want to lose my touch. Must lock self in room.

8. half a bag of mini-eggs on my closet shelf

A New Low

Actually, this isn't that low, just sad: I cried at the library today. In serious need of some library time (even though I have about 5 books already on the go and they are going slowly). The library is a refuge and sanctuary for me. This was my first visit since, you know, (aka. attempting to ruin my own life) but I knew that I would have to return eventually. I stopped by while running errands (Happy Birthday, sister) and my stomach started to wiggle as I got closer. In charge of my emotions I opened the familiar door and strolled in. I got a friendly greeting from one of the staff that I knew from *before* but opening my mouth basically set me off. Making it through the obligatory social niceties I disappeared into the stacks. It wasn't a full out cryfest but just a few tears. I found my books and received a death stare at the counter.
1 - pleasant greeting
1 - deathstare
4 - books

Vacation

Approximately 78 minutes ago I arrived at my parents' house for a month of vacation. I mentioned all of my grand plans a few posts ago. This is about a first that wasn't on my official list: I bought a bikini. Yikes! Technically it isn't a true first because I owned a rainbow one at the age of 7 that I begged my mother to buy me at the Northern Store. My more recent one is (I think) a bit more sophisticated in a dark brown with some autumn-leaf-coloured jewels. My biggest problem right now is actually wearing it out of the house. I think I could pull it off if I spent all of my time either standing or laying down without transition time (and no sitting or bending at the waist for any purpose). This somewhat limits my range of motion. Perhaps it will act as a motivator for the next few weeks to boost my running that has dwindled from 4-5 times per week to 2-3.

On the topic of swimwear, I've recently found a new waxer*. She will forever be my waxer: foul-mouthed, hilarious, chatty and great prices. If only I could afford to employ her full-time. A less painful solution could be the personal laser hair removal system for just $500. Costco sells them. (of course they do). It only has to be used every 2-3 weeks so, conceivably, it could be split about 10 ways and passed around to make it much more affordable. Honestly, it would become my new hobby as they say it takes about 8 treatments spread into 2-4 week increments.

And, jumping back to running, I haven't updated in a while. A few weeks ago I set a personal best on an early morning run: 29 minutes for 5km. It felt glorious. Potential setback in the making though after yesterday's development of a sore heel. It seems to hurt only with walking and not running so I'm hoping that I can keep up the (lax) regimen I've been on. I've taken to wearing the fivefingers around town to promote walking on the front part of my foot, away from my tender heel. I'm still supporting the weird-looking shoes.

*I subscribe to the view that hair on women is meant to be removed. I realize that this isn't the most enlightened view or the one most free of male oppression but I am wholly indoctrinated and truly believe in the evils of the hair follicle anywhere other than a few select areas.

August 2010

Since I likely won't be working this August (my one month off of school this year) I've decided to tackle some life goals. Albeit some smaller life goals but goals nonetheless. I keep a little goal list over at 43Things because I enjoy checking them off waaaay too much.

The ones I intend to complete this summer include, but are not limited to:
1. Run 10km (ok, I'm only at 7km now and being lazy so this one is a stretch....but who knows)
2. Send a postcard to postsecret (now I need a secret....)
3. Write a letter to the editor (or any editor, it doesn't have to be the one. Perhaps I'll write in praise of the latest National Geographic. I didn't specify that the letter had to be scathing)
4. See a meteor shower (August 12th, the Perseids. Drive north and look east)
5. Make jam (flavour suggestions? I'm thinkin rasp)
6. Make a pie (falls under the same category as jam: domestic)
7. Make a pinhole camera (I've wanted to do this since high school photography class)
8. Unnamed item on the list (I have a plan)
9. Commit a poem to memory (Just used the rest of my BMV/ANEGS gift card on a book of Pablo Neruda poetry in English and Spanish...now which language to memorize?)

Whitby Shoutout

As July ends I find myself counting down the days until I have August off. Then I can hang out with all my pregger friends at the beach. Right now though, I must focus on my last four days of placement. Two days at an audiology clinic, two days at a private speech-pathology clinic: lots of paperwork. Some of you may know that I have been crashing in Whitby on the weekdays to avoid the 4 hours of Go Transit each day. Now I walk there in 20 minutes in the golden sunshine. Let's just say that I'm living in style too. In the past I have called "having matching furniture" living in style but this is a notch above. The house is owned by a couple about my parent's age. We eat dinner and sip wine in the evenings before taking a dip in the pool. Then I retire to the library to read. The other day I was taken on an art tour of the home which doubles as an art gallery from time to time. Go giant old farm houses.

Things I did at the audiology clinic today:
1. Participated in taking ear mold impressions.
2. Sat in on hearing aid fittings
3. Conducted manual tympanometry on myself. I have small canals and a Type A compliance (this means something else in the ear world!)
4. Videotaped myself cleaning a hearing aid and changing the battery

And Rant: We have to locate a Quality of Life measure that would be appropriate for the populations that we are working with in placement. This is fine for everyone in voice and fluency but more difficult at other placements. Since starting placement I have been scouting for one but nothing and there are but 4 days left. I can find some online but can't get access to the actual survey without paying exorbitant fees. None of the placement sites I have been to have any on hand. I scoured the resource room at school (yes, the very school that assigned this ridiculous task) and found it to be entirely lacking. Lacking not just in QoL surveys for my population for for any population. Way to practice what you preach!

Does anyone have a QoL that would work for infants, toddlers or preschoolers with multiple needs, language delays, autism or hearing impairments? (not for all but for one or more of those things)? Help!

First Peanuts and now....

Toilet paper rolls???? What isn't considered 'dangerous' these days? I firmly believe that health and safety regulations are getting a little ridiculous. This week I planned a craft for a group therapy activity that involved fashioning a pirate using a toilet paper roll. However, we ended up making (cool) paper bag pirate puppets (say that 10 times fast) because IT IS AGAINST HEALTH REGULATIONS TO USE TOILET PAPER ROLLS!!!! My first thought was: ok, maybe they discovered the glue was horribly toxic a la Seinfeld envelopes. The true reason, though, is simply that the toilet paper rolls have been inside the bathroom. What? I've been inside a bathroom, am I allowed to conduct therapy before a hazmat washdown? Give kids a little more credit and some room to grow and breathe.

ANEGS in July

Way back in December our class celebrated ANEGS that involved an exchange of goods (and some services). From the lovely Sharon (potential new code name: Hurlkerr? Eddie?) I received a crisp BMV Books gift certificate. A perfect gift. Yet I was still holding on to it, safely in my wallet in case I pass by a BMV, which I have done a few times since. The thing about gift cards is that they hold potential; endless possibilities. Because of this it takes me many trips to said store and much mulling over various choices to be sure that I select the very best. On the way home last night from the Victory Cafe with 3 friends from undergrad (75% of the group was former Campus for Christ staff) I discovered that BMV is open until midnight on Fridays.

My finds for the night:
Swimming Lessons, a collection of short stories by Rohinton Mistry. I always claim that he is my favourite author but I haven't strayed from his novels. Now I'm branching out.

The World Without Us by Alan Weisman. I've already posted about this book. It is a personal favourite and have been contemplating a second read.

I still have a little potential left on the card for later :)

Sudoku

I've become interested in these number puzzles because I've been taking the GO bus a few times a week and, well, it seems to be something that people do on GO buses. The great (?) thing is that I only need one puzzle for the whole ride. I am just horrendous at them. The Sudoku code says over 25 minutes and I should "keep practicing" which is about as honest as it gets. I don't even want to say how long those things usually take me....

Firsts

First time at Niagara-on-the-Lake this Saturday. JPD and I hit up a lovely Southbrook Vinyards to celebrate the union of a fellow SLP to his new wife (congrats Mr & Mrs Sultry Scholarly Scowl). It was movie-perfect: outdoors under a tent surrounded by grapes, cool and unexpected soundtrack, poignant but not-too-long speeches with a hilarious slideshow, good food, happy couple. The bride was stunning and the groom handsome. Too bad I almost hit the old-fashioned bridal car in the parking lot as it was transporting the bride to the door! Luckily she has a good sense of humour!

I'm going to blame another first for being frazzled by that point in the drive. I took on the city of Toronto by Toyota Matrix along with the Gardiner/QEW/403 to the destination. I thought the fast-paced million-laned highway would be the frightening part but I would take that any day over city driving. Although we did park on the 403 for a while (over 3 hours from downtown for our trip!)...still, after dropping off the lovely JPD it took me 45 to drive home through the city. It takes me 45 minutes to walk to her house. Awesome. No props to the city of Toronto for keeping Bloor Street in a constant state of reparation. When will it end?????

Relocated (Again) and Other Stories.

It feels as if I am constantly relocating. Since I graduated high school I have lived in 8 different houses/apartments/rooms...not counting the many summers my mom and I packed up everything I owned and carted it back north. And not counting the place I'm currently crashing: a swanky place in Whitby with an inground pool and fabulous family. Why? I'm too small town to commute 1.5 - 2 hrs by GO Transit from TO to Whitby every day. It isn't even much more expensive. Oh, AND not counting the new place I"ll be moving into in August because the amazing apartment is only a sublet. So that makes 10 by August. I can't wait to settle down a bit.....I think.

This will be a bit of a jumble of a post.

Running Update
Back on my feet Friday for a 5km. Then Saturday morning I finally completed the 7km I had set my sights on. Although my runs since then have felt sluggish and awful...probably due to the oppressive heat still lingering at 645am! Southern Ontario will be the death of my fitness.

Pride Update
This past week was Pride 2010 in Toronto and I was living right in the heart of the action. The streets were closed down, booths set up everywhere promoting everything from Gay Curling Clubs to bears. On Sunday, Yonge St. hosted the Pride Parade....for over 2.5 hours. I don't know exactly how long because I was forced to leave by my impending dehydration (yes, we brought water). But it was worth it. This is one of my favourite shots, notice the composition.And a few bonus pics:

Confession

This post has been a long time coming. Actually, I'm writing this now without planning to post it. So if you are reading it then like A) I've lost my mind. B) I've grown some ovaries. C) I'm intoxicated. Perhaps I'm just tired of pretending to be someone that I am not.

During the second half of high school and most of my undergraduate degree I was a faithfilled, dedicated Christian. I loved Jesus and truly wanted to serve him with my life. Some time in my fourth year I began to question this faith. I knew that I never truly felt 'saved' and my faith was an almost constant source of guilt and anxiety: I looked at the people I loved and 'knew' they would be going to hell; I felt like I always needed to have a hidden 'conversion' agenda in my friendships; I hated judging others based on their lifestyle choices. How condescending is the oh-so-common Christian phase "We accept ____ people but just not their lifestyle/sin/choices". That doesn't sound much like acceptance to me.

For a few years after that I wavered between trying to regain my faith and life according to the Bible and being a content Agnostic. Without religion though, I found that the guilt and anxiety that I had felt for so many years was gone. The relationships in my life improved because I was being honest with myself and others. With most others that is. Maybe you're one person I wasn't honest with. It is probably because you're someone who matters very much to me but who happens to be a Christian and, because I lack courage, I worried about losing you in my life. I withdrew by avoiding Christian events and discussions outside of church. Anyone who asked about my faith was given an honest answer but few people asked (this isn't saying it was your fault, it is easy to assume that someone would continue to practice the faith they had for so long).

I think this blogger sums up my reluctance to expose myself quite well: "I never have abandoned morality, just as I still can not find the strength to tell any of my family members and friends (at least the Christian ones) the truth - I have become the very thing they pity most. It is not that they will hate me, or get angry. It is rather that they will feel sorry for me and try to counsel me and pray for me and murmur this poison: God is beyond the wisdom and logic of man. They would do the things that I would have done. And so I keep my silence and I go to Church on Sundays and I sing praises to God in the car with my mother and I pray at family gatherings like a good Christian would. Except that I'm not."

There it is: the truth. I'm tired of lying. I no longer consider myself a Christian and I don't foresee that changing. I hope that I don't lose your friendship but, in the end, that is your decision.

[ETA: this was written a month or two ago. I decided to post it because it doesn't really matter anymore. It was going to come out eventually and I hate pretending.]

Back in Action

I finally put my crazy shoes back on and went out for a run. Instead of trying for speed I went for feel-goodness. And I did. 5.13km in about 32 minutes and I felt great the whole time. AND it was in the middle of the afternoon. I don't tend to fare well running in the midday sun.

Talking with CabbagePatch (the current housie) made me realize that I don't really own any bling. No man or family member has ever showered me with jewelry (mostly at my own request; I'm more into cheap costume jewelry and tend to lose things). Besides, this is the kind of bling I want:
Check it out here to see all the fabulous specs. I could know my HEART RATE! Which would be helpful because the book keeps telling me to stay within 70% of my max heart rate. If I go over 100% does my heart explode?