Books on the Brain

The other day I had a refreshing conversation with a fellow bibliophile, let's call her Beth because that is her name. I would love to say that it brought me back to thoughts (fantasies? ) about books however I was already there.

What I am reading now:

Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky.
-This is almost complete after weeks and weeks of reading faithfully over my lunch hours. This isn't the kind of book I could ever recommend to anyone because I have enjoyed reading it but to be honest: it is really long and tedious! Why should I hate it? Humour is mostly related to quotes from old Russian writers that I have never heard of, it is almost 1000 pages with itty-bitty writing, it was written in the 1800s and translated from Russian (I'm using this for the reason that absolutely everyone is ridiculously over-dramatic, the women are 'hysterical', everyone makes eyelid-drooping speeches.....) Why do I like it? No idea. But I will feel soooo good when I finish these last 90 pages.

Born to Kvetch: Yiddish Language and Culture in All of its Moods by Michael Wex
-Mostly this is much more linguistic based than it is funny. Looks funny, isn't really. If you like how languages evolve then this book might just be for you. Kvetch is Yiddish for "to complain" which is basically what the language seems to have evolved around, at least according to Wex.

Vandal Love by D.Y. Bechard
-Canadian lit I could actually not wait to open. So far I'm only a few chapters in but it has already surprised me quite a bit. The description focuses on the Herve family that alternately births runts and giants. I wasn't really expecting boxing to come into it, but hey, I'm open. I'm still excited but have no idea what to expect.

I have never really looked good in hats

This past weekend my mother and I passed a significant portion of our lives in the van, with my stuff. Thanks to my uncle Frank who decided to come with us to London (with his two kids as well) we unloaded everything much more quickly than my mother and i could have done. Oh, and he put my desk together. It looked easy but it was not. I would have just remained deskless. The verdict is...not in yet. Although the house is quite large, 5 floors total (tall, skinny townhouse) it is so far sparsely furnished. Cons: old furniture, very white, somewhat depressing. Pros: nice big kitchen, dining area is cool and overlooks living room, someone brought a super nintendo.

It also appears that i may be living with people who are vastly beyond me in coolness level. While we didn't meet yet there was a piano in the entrance beside the long board (skate board that is long) and down the stairs from the guitar and keyboard. Musical and sporty. Those are my two....weaknesses? Inadequacies? things that make people cool that I don't have....
Plus i'm at least 3 years older than two of them. So I'm old. They are younger than my little sis. I realize this doesn't actually matter but I do feel old (helped along by the fact that I already have a degree and took a year off to travel/work).

I am excited for all the classes I will take and the great volunteer placement I have already secured (key for applying to grad school in speech pathology). It is working with a group of children on Saturdays to do therapies assigned by their SLPs and teachers during the week.....I believe. Or something along those lines. Woot! But sad. I love it here, I belong here, I will miss Mark terribly. Why do I need more school?

Starting Over

For over 10 years I have held on to the same debit card but it died this weekend. It is like that record-breaking pet hamster that doubles the typical hamster 3 years, or more. I wish I had documented it's use, maybe it was worthy of the guinness book of world records. If I am to top this with another card I will be about 35! I can't even think that far. *fingers crossed I'm done school by then*

A hirsuit Dennis the Menace

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That first line of blogging is courtesy of the furball I am keeping company over the week. Little Rizzo, gray with black stripes and white paws is a big ball of mischief. From the moment I enter the house until I go to bed and shut him out he constantly needs to be at my side. The other cat, Gonzo, has barely taken the time to say hello but has glared at me from afar twice. It isn't that I irresponsibly ignore my charge either. We play, bond over a spring-loaded red pompom with a bell and he purrs while I offer my hands to rub himself against. This is my first experience of having a real pet, meaning a pet that requires care and/or has free range of the house. Previously my family has housed fish and a crab. That is it, neither really enjoyed interacting with me.

I don't mind i suppose. The unlimited affection is nice, he is pretty cute as he naps beside the mouse with his extra claws that catch on everything sticking up. Really though, I can't sit to eat because then he has his face in the food. No playing on the computer without my toes being nipped or someone trying to catch the mouse (well the vitual manifestation as the cursor). Ideally I would have a cat just slightly less interested in me than Rizzo is and maybe not a dog after all. They are much less work and easier to leave for an entire day (due mostly to the indoor waste excretion). Maybe a cat it would be. They make nice companions, tonight I'll try telling him all of my secrets and troubles.

This Entry Needs a Photo

A photo with all 10 of us awkwardly arranged around the table would have perfectly captured three hours last evening. The big meeting, referred to as a "Meet-the-Fockers-party" by a woman at work, was held last night with better-than-predicted results. That is right folks, my parents and Mark's parents met and nothing collided nor crickets chirped. On the whole it was a pleasant evening. Even my 16-year-old brother stuck around for most of the chatting; the brother that repeatedly asked me if he had to eat with us and then if he was required to stay after he finished (which he was not).

They brought oven mitts as a gift. My dad cooked heaps of meat and roasty veggies. We looked at pictures of Mark and I (by their request, it was not forced). His mom said awkwardly nice things (I'm not good with the outright in font of everyone compliments.....uncomfortable), which can't really be complained about but I will anyway. All of our brainstorming of potential topics of conversation or areas of similarity were was unnecessary.

Some Things are Taboo for a Good Reason

Mark's parents are in town. Well, not IN town but at a cottage (camp!) outside of the city. Last night we drove the 2o minutes to visit and, even though the scenery is very Ken Danby -esque, we avoided the junky weather by playing board games indoors. Everyone more or less enthusiastically took to Taboo. For those unfamiliar with this classic players are broken into teams and each person takes turns trying to get their team to guess words on a card. The kicker is that you have to describe it and can use personal anecdotes, etc. but each has a list of 5 'Taboo' words that you cannot use. For example, in describing The Dark Knight you couldn't say Gotham, Movie, Batman, the Joker, Heath Ledger (if only it was that up to date!)

All this explanation for one of the best moments of my life (in terms of hilarity). Mark and I made up one team and his parents and sister created the other. We were annoyingly good at the game using all types of shared experiences and anecdotes.

I get the word Career and it is up to Mark to guess.

Me: "I haven't started this"
Mark (interrupting me): YOUR PERIOD!
Me: ....yet

His mom missed the comment however it wasn't lost on anyone else. Best line ever, especially when remembering that Mark is a fairly introverted person (especially around his fam). I'm not sure how happy he is going to be with this story on the internet.

I feel like a giant hickory stick

I lathered, rinsed and repeated. I let the conditioner sit for an extended period of time. I scrubbed. Twice. I STILL smell like campfire. Hopefully it is subtle enough that no one at work today connects the scent to me.

Most of the time it rained or threatened rain. Pancake Bay (where our church rented three group camp sites) is notorious for having cold water which it lived up to. I spent about 10 minutes in the water, in my clothing, mostly to make sure that I swam at least once all weekend.

One of the most popular topics on conversation in tent-city, where we all huddled to avoid the rain, was The Dark Knight. There is little left to say about the film that hasn't been said and a review would be somewhat redundant. Yes, Heath Ledger as the Joker was easily the best part of the film. Yum, Christian Bale as Batman. "Want to see me make this pencil disappear?"

Calm is my middle name

My little brother turned 16 a few weeks ago. Last week he called me at work to brag that he passed his G1 test AND drove home. With a whole 7 days of driving to his name I only had images of slight disfigurement (instead of a painful, horrible death) and said yes when asked if we could reverse driving roles and he take me to work instead of the opposite; Are you walking the dog or is the dog walking you scenario?
It really was just around a few corners and jail cell lengths down a busy street but I was fairly self-congratulatory as I tested my breathing and listened intently at my pulse. Not even on edge. I was the cool sister, cucumberesque. The only giveaway was that I kept reaching up and clasping the seatbelt that crossed my chest.

Silver Medal Club

There is a club (unofficial) that meets in the four venue food court of the mall I work in. The only criteria for membership are either physical or subjective.
If the majority of these apply you're in!

1. Bifocals: you can't see far away and you can't read close up.
2. Grey hair (not just one or two but many). Died counts.
3. Cotton pant suits in bright or pastel colours. (Have flood pants in light green with pleats down the front?)
4. Hearing aid and/or dentures
5. Enjoy walking back and forth repetitively for exercise
6. Retired (bonus points if what you retired from was teaching)
7. Wallet/purse with photos of grandchildren
8. Plenty of complaints (mostly physical, weather or government related; extra points if you have arthritis pains from the weather and the government isn't covering the medical claims)

That is it, if you check off four or more then you are in. Show up before the mall opens, grab some comfy walking shoes and a coffee.

If that is retirement I don't look forward to it. Although I never thought I would like going to bed early or garage saling. Maybe waking up before dawn to meet the mall club is as inevitable as switching to elastic pants after a certain (for comfort of course).

You Hear it but you Don't really Know

After one boy and one girl are selected to leave So You Think You Can Dance each Thursday evening our Fox station switches to the local news, which in our area is Detroit and Rochester. It is beyond painful to watch but for about 10 minutes I did just that like I watch obese people on TV eat junk food.

Scenario 1: A severely overweight white lady with WAY-TOO-BLOND hair is interviewed while she waits alone in line to be served $1.50 per gallon gas as part of some white republican's campaign for office of something or other. (From memory) "It is sure worth the wait for us SUV drivers" Ok, that isn't really a quote but a paraphrase with the thick accent she was carrying.

Scenario 2: 'Special' interest story out of Mobile (pronounced: Mo-beel), Alabama. A group of people have spotted a Leprechaun and now hoards of onlookers wait for nightfall to catch a glimpse of the Leprechaun in the tree. One man claims that he plans to rip down the tree for a pot of gold. Another (with a mouth full of gold teeth) claims he believes! Believes!

Scenario 3: Merchants lament in a city hall meeting about the inevitable future downfall of their massive indoor shopping complex (aka a mall aka capitalist depression/ADD/social anxiety disorder maker). Why is this decline inevitable? Because of an increase in the sales tax by 3 EIGHTS OF ONE PERCENT! Oh no, people will feel it, they will stop shopping at the mall, property taxes will go up pushing prices up further and then they will never go back to the mall! Ever!

Although a little too dramatic for my liking it probably would even be good if the mall just shut'er down.

And a little treat from an hilariously fun tee website "Busted Tees". Think "saved by the Bell"

N'SYNC with NG

For the past two issues of National Geographic Magazine sent to my home as part of my subscription birthday gift from Mark (shout out) there have been featured destinations that I have actually seen. Yes, NG has probably featured 97% of the globe but I couldn't relate before. Last month (actually right before we left) there was a story about Stonehenge in preparation of our trip. This month there is the Salt Flats in Uyuni, Bolivia (or Alitplano as they called it). It is incredible to see things in NG that I have stood directly in front of myself, that I felt the strong gusts of wind and smelled the horrible smell of the flamingo poo.

Mary, Mary Quite Contrary

Thank you, my garden grows quite well. I have weeded and covered and fussed for a few weeks now and the plants look good. My favourite time is watching the sprouts push themselves up from the soil; a whole row may come up while I'm at work. It makes me want to attempt stop-action photography.

Something I Avoid when it is my Responsibility

For the last three hours of work yesterday Amanda and I wrote a Valedictorian speech. The biggest surprise was that I thoroughly enjoyed it. I'm actually reasonably funny. This reaffirms my theory that I enjoy writing for others, I don't enjoy it if the pressure is my own to do the presenting.

Being Ushered (Grudgingly) into the 21st Century

Friday I caved and signed the next three years of my life away. It was about time, I will be dependent on this device away at school but it didn't really make it much easier. It felt like caving in, like giving up on my principles. I always thought I would try to hold out as long as possible and, in time, be the only person left above the extreme poverty line to own a cell phone. That is true no longer. Say hello to Isadora:

Actually neither are actually Isadora but her friends of different phone ethnicities. She is orange (a nice burnt orange, not tacky) and had me at the cool slide out QWERTY keypad since I am way behind on this texting thing. The plan is decent (Oh, the phone in an LG Rumour on a Solo plan), if not excessive. Good for a student away from home but I don't see myself using all 2500 text messages monthly.

Happy 16th Birthday, little Brother

16 years ago today, David Michael completed our family. He actually went by David Michael for the first few years of his life which allowed me to have a connected with Kristy from the Baby Sitters' Club (she had a brother of the same moniker).
Back on track, I have often thought that he was what saved our family from tearing each other apart. From shutting our respective doors and leading our separate lives completely. We could ignore each other but were connected at least through our little bro.

As a kid he was, sorry Dave, whiny and bad tempered. He cried and yelled when he lost at nintendo, he hated having dirty hands and he was terrible at sharing. How that bratty little brother become someone I brag about often, someone exceptionally generous, even-tempered and sweet can't be our doing; it must just be his nature. From oddly tinkering with wires and scraps of metal he can now take apart almost anything and fix it. He comes up with the most incredibly random projects and can figure out how to complete them. The light bulb that lit in his hand. His custom guitar. A conduit to switch gaming systems with the flick of a switch. Many others that I can't remember because I never understood them to begin with. He kicks my ass in math without even trying (Only 98% Dave? Where did the other 2 percent go?). He plays the guitar. Behind his head. During his guitar exams.

There is no doubt he will do something worthwhile. I can't wait to see what it is but either way he will just be my little bro and the great connector in our family.

So much truth in it

While U of Guelph campus can fall into quite a few of these categories one comes to mind especially readily. This may be a result of living in South residence for my first year but the "Neo-Penal" is a perfect fit. How many tales of prison design origin and low ceilings to avoid thrown chairs were whispered to dismayed first years as they gazed on their southern home for the first time. Ah Guelph, a product of the 60s (established 1964).

Shout out the the very relevant (and I'm not even a grad student...yet) phdcomics.com for this image.

365 and a Leap Day

Happy One Year, Mark!

Lies Suck

Even though my degree is in marketing (ugh) I still can't fathom that a person or company would just outright lie to make me/us buy something. While in London I did some shopping at the Portobello market for some jewelry (lovely 1940s stuff that I promptly forgot in London) and was given the same line by two separate women right away. I bought it grudgingly because I don't like to assume that anyone could outright lie.

The line was "ok, 15 pounds. That is my cost price, just for you"
Right, just for me, from the special bond we developed as a perused their selection. They lowered the price with almost no provocation but with the "cost price" caveat. How could I argue any lower? They wouldn't go to cost price so easily; it was a complete lie.

Companies are not immune to this an lately a few campaigns have been irking me. So You Think You Can Dance has lured me back into the TV watching world. The first is Hellman's. Mayonnaise is joining the real food movement. Real food for dummies. That isn't fair. But it is playing on the health and going back to organic trend but selling jiggling fat sandwich topper. Not too much natural about that stuff.

Looking at the site it does promote more locally grown foods (choosing local tomatoes over the ones shipped in and wasting fuel, etc.) but where does Hellman's come from? Where is my locally grown Hellman's?? Preservatives, shipped across the continent in transports wasting fuel, mmmm, such a great topping for my locally grown tomatoes on rye.

Next: Bounty towels. They have the audacity to tell us that choosing their PAPER towels with the option to choose smaller sheets will save the future. Look out future, I'm using smaller paper towels. If it was about the future then ban paper towels and everyone use something renewable...a cloth dammit! (excuse me, i'm getting into this). This is playing on fears of the future and helping people to feel better by doing dick all. It actually does more harm than good because people can allay their guilt while not helping the environment at all. I'm not perfect in this area but I hate when companies play people for foos. There is a website, I'll find it. Something about the future.

The Joy of Reading

When reading a book I tend to prefer the first 3/4 of the book over the climax and denouement. The bulk of the book before the crisis builds the characters. It tends to set a rhythm and establish grooves that the characters fit into. To bring the book to a close these balances are disturbed.

Currently the latest book to cause this desire to stop reading and leave the characters in tact, peaceful and, even if not in the best circumstances, content in routine and satisfaction. The book found my interest through Canada Reads 2008, even though it did not come out the winner. Its general premise is taken from Genesis and the story of the flood but little other than the water, animals and names are parallel with the Bible. Another day or two and I"ll give a full assessment.

So Closes my first year as a traveller

This time last year I was preparing my luggage for a week in Bermuda. At 515pm yesterday I was enjoying Chicago by Sufjan Stevens as the wheels of our airplane caressed the runway in Toronto. The air hosts neglected to ask everyone to turn off all electronics or personal music devices and, to me, that was an invitation to land with a soundtrack.

This puts my count of World Heritage sites seen at 9/851. Not that I'm exactly trying to see all World Heritage sites but I can't add any more Wonders of the World to my list after this trip.

Things accomplished:
1. Vicariously lived the posh Londoner lifestyle staying in the four bedroom flat near the centre with a private garden for the neighbourhood and a porter. Twiggy, former super model, also lets a flat in the building.
2. Rode the Tube with Oyster cards
3. 'Shopped' at Harrods. Decided not to buy the Mammoth tusk. Drank tea upstairs and ate clotted cream scones.
4. Tower of London.
5. Tower bridge
6. Roman Baths
7. Stonehenge
8. Changing of the guard
9. Portobello and Camden markets
10. Most free exhibits (British Museum, Natural History Museum, Science Museum, Victoria and Albert Museum, and other free stuff)
11. Saw the Magna Carta
12. Cruised the Thames
13. Ate fish and chips in a pub
14. Realized that 'London Bridge' isn't anything to look at. It is Tower Bridge
15. Had a lovely dinner with Mark of all Indian food.
16. Hyde park
17. Generally touristy things

We were generously hosted by family in the city putting us beside a Tube station and within walking distance to Hyde park and other attractions or a short tube ride. London is greener than expected. Everything has a history. It is beautiful at night. You don't hear much English spoken in the breeding ground for the native tongue.